All of this talk about Bill Cosby and his alleged rape victims has started up some serious emotions worldwide. You see, women have been sexually violated for hundreds of years. History tells us that women have had very little rights as far speaking freely, deciding on who they want to marry, and what they could and could not do with their bodies.
Looking back at all of that, it should make you feel extremely appreciative to be born during a century where women actually have the power to make decisions for themselves. But even though we’ve come a long way, many people’s mind sets have not changed when it comes to blaming women for their own rape.
I stated in a Facebook post earlier this week that many women don’t report their abusers because they’re often made out to be the guilty party instead of the victim. Many women don’t report the rapist because the rapist is someone with power and is well respected. On paper, the rapist is an outstanding citizen. But let’s think about what we really know about rapists: One thing is that they like to be in control and they often have a certain type. Rapists often feel they can’t get caught so they continuously assault different victims.
Some of the comments that I have read regarding the Bill Cosby situation are downright disturbing. What’s even more disturbing is that many of these comments are coming from women. It appears that women have taken on the misogynistic views given to us by society. Do you think it can’t happen to you? Do you know all the facts regarding the cases? Have you been reading the information about the rapes instead of just making a quick judgment? If you have been reading, you should know that some of these rape victims came to the surface years ago! You would know that many of them have nothing financial to gain by coming forward. However, many media outlets were scared to run the stories due to the powerful influence that Bill Cosby has. This isn’t about Bill Cosby though. This is about rape and guilt!
It wasn’t until 1974 when it became illegal for a husband to rape his wife. I was told today by a woman that your body belongs to your husband. I was also told that within a healthy marriage a wife should always have sex with her husband when he wants it. My question is: how healthy is a marriage if your husband doesn’t respect the fact that his wife said no for whatever reason, and he decides to take it anyway? Is that healthy? How healthy would your relationship or marriage be after that? No means no, no matter who says it. Rape victims already feel guilty because their bodies often react to the trauma of sexual force. They often feel guilty because it happened and that they think it was something they have done to cause such a horrific crime.
Imagine your daughter, your niece, your cousin, or your friend being drugged and raped by their friend, mentor, or trusted associate, or even by a stranger. What if they were dragged in an alley, tortured and then had their attacker force themselves upon their bodies? Would you then have a different outlook on rape?
It’s extremely disheartening that many people do not take rape seriously. In every major city there are crime labs with tons of untested rape kits! It seems to me that we’re failing women again with a place in society by not taking our issues and tragedies with earnest.